You have been parenting all along, but now you have time to think about it. You may parent the same as your parents did. On the other hand, you may choose to parent differently.
How did your parents treat you?
- My way or else. Did they have lots of rules and make you do what they wanted? How did that make you feel? Do you want your child to feel that way?
- Anything goes. Did they let you do almost anything you wanted? How did that make you feel? Do you want your child to feel that way?
- In between. Did they talk with you about the rules, then trust you to go by them? How did that make you feel? Do you want your child to feel that way?
Your child loves you and wants to grow up to be just like you.
He will do best with in-between parenting, when you do your jobs with feeding, and let him do his jobs with eating. That gives him both guidance and trust.
Feeding is parenting
- You do in-between parenting when you decide the schedule and the menu for meals and snacks and keep eating times pleasant. He goes by what you say because he wants to please you.
- You do anything-goes parenting when you make special food. Even then, he may fuss and complain. He wants you to show him how to behave.
- You do my-way-or-else parenting when you make your child eat. He may eat it, but he won’t learn to enjoy it. He will stop eating it when you stop making him eat it.